Schitzophonic

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Dream Diary 1

So, I had a rather strange dream last night that I feel compelled to recount.

To give background for my dream that I created during the dream:

Congolese rebels are on the attack, burning villages on their way to the presidential compound in Brazzaville. Prior to these attacks CBS chose the location as the site for Survivor 14 of which I was selected to be a contestant. The 16 castaways have already been dropped off when the dream begins.

So, I remember thinking, so this is it...we're on our own...no food, no water. We were given a map that led us to our camp. In order to get there we had to traverse miles and miles of lush African Grasslands. The big five animals were no where in sight. They had all been massacred by the rebel fighters. All that stood out was dead golden grass waving in the wind. The tribe entered the fenced compound that belonged to the president of the country. A river rushed by one edge of the property with treacherous rapids - perhaps the Sangha? My group continued uphill through more grass and we set our meager belongings next to a giant mansion that belonged to the president.

I quickly made an alliance with Mechell Ndegeocello who was the surprise celebrity. The competition was rather vague. I remember preparing myself for headaches from not drinking water and being very hungry. What was wierd about this was that we were allowed to use the mansion and we would take showers and swim in the pool and other people in the group would eat and drink. I kept telling them: Hey, this isn't really the point, is it? But eventually I gave up trying to hunt rodents in the grass and opened the freezer for a Bocca Burger. After the tribes merged I learned that Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfeifer were also competing. Bruce Willis was the first to go after we merged and as he left he asked everyone if they wanted to see his wang. I had been told by J. that his female friend had "done" Bruce and that his wiener was not all that, but what he showed us was swollen and large, encased in black latex with the chestnuts free to breathe. Following this and before departing, Michelle (not Mechell) and Bruce snuggled and kissed because while they were on the same tribe for the beginning of Survivor Congo they became close and fell in L.O.V.E.

I didn't win the competition because other parts of the dream involved me sitting in on the tribal councils as a jury member. The rest is vague and nobody went on strike and nobody wrote pointless articles that don't really say anything at all. But eventually I did wake up and people were on strike and people were writing pointless articles that don't really say anything at all.

I've seen Color of Night, so I know that I was very generous to Bruce, but I know deep inside that it's not how big it is, but how you use it. Feel free to leave comments with links to naked photos of Mr. Willis.